Ponies

Ponies is the second episode of KRA.

Basic Summary
Kirby meets his new neighbors for the first time (Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy), and isn't so thrilled due to a traumatizing incident that happened to him as a child that involved ponies. Now, Kirby sets out to kill his new neighbors, but fails.

Transcript
(Kirby is seen knocking at Yirby's door)

Yirby: *Opens door* Broke out of prison again?

Kirby: Third time this hour!

(Kirby walks inside the house)

(Kirby immediatly goes to the kitchen to get some beer, only to find that there is no beer)

Kirby: What the hell is THIS?

Yirby: What?

Kirby: There's no freakin' beer!

Yirby: No s**t, Sherlock. You drank them all.

Kirby: GET MORE!

Yirby: Why don't you?

Kirby: *Grabs a crowbar and smashes Yirby's head*

Yirby:...Ya'know, just go ask teh neighbors.

(Cut to the outside of the house, where a car parks.)

Kirby: Wait, what? Those are some pretty deformed-ass neighbors.

(Yirby looks at them through binoculars)

Yirby: That's because they're not Kirbys. They're ponies.

Kirby: Ponies? I doubt those big-girls-blouses would have any beer for me. I'm sure they're very much sober.

Yirby: Yes, Kirby, ponies. Now get your ass out of that twist and learn to live without alcohol.

Kirby: Ponies. (he loses himself in thought for a second) Ponies? Ponies! PONIES!!!

Yirby: What's wrong, Kirby?

Kirby: The ponies... oh my god... (he convulses for a second and has a mini-seizure)

Yirby: Dude, they're ponies. Why are you freakin' scared of them? You been reading too much "Cupcakes"?

Kirby: Alright, some pretty twisted stuff happened to me in my childhood to do with ponies.

Yirby: What stuff?

Kirby: Well, I was six years old, and - BYE, SEE YA ROUND! (He jumps out of window, and breaks his leg. We see an ambulance come past.)

(Cut to the ponies' house.)

Pinkie Pie: FLUTTERSHY GET YOUR FATASS OVER HERE!

(Fluttershy walks in)

Fluttershy: Yes, boss?

Pinkie Pie: THERE'S A SMALL PINK HAIR IN MY SOUP!

Fluttershy: Oh dear! Terribly sorry boss, let me remove th-

(Pinkie Pie suddenly grabs a gun and shoots Fluttershy)

Pinkie Pie: TRY HARDER NEXT TIME!

(A door knock is heard)

Pinkie Pie: DOOR'S OPEN!

Nigel: *From outside the house* NO, IT's F***ING NOT!

Pinkie Pie: TRY OPENING IT HARDER!

(Nigel grabs a bazooka and breaks down the door)

Pinkie Pie: THERE YA GO!

Nigel:...Listen, some of my hookers have been stolen!

Pinkie Pie:...THEN WHY THE HELL DO YOU THINK I HAVE THEM?!

Nigel: *suddenly blows up*

Pinkie Pie:....dafuq just happened?

(At Yirby's house)

(Kirby is seen hiding under the couch)

Yirby: So why are you afraid of ponies?

Kirby: It-it all started...when I was 6. I was at a roadeo for my sister's 4th birthday. We have never riden a horse before. When my sis rode the horse, it seemed liked it was easy, as it seemed like she was having fun. So when I got onto the horse, I rode it. Suddenly, the horse started walking, to an abandon house. I did nothing as I thought the mindless horse knew what it was f***in' doin'. The horse entered, pushed me off, and turned on the lights. As the lights turned on, I saw..corpses. Tons and tons of goddamned corpses. It was a horrifying sight. Suddenly, the horse strapped me to a table, as I tried to escape, but failed, and held out a sawblade connected to a stick. It was about to cut my arm off, when suddenly, the owner of the roadeo suddenly show up. The owner was shocked, and suddenly grabbed out a gun and shot the horse. I was safely returned to my parents, and I never spoke of the incident until now.

Yirby:....Damn, your childhood was pretty messed up.

Kirby: I know.

Yirby: But Kirby, you've gotta face the music.

Kirby: How will facing music help me with this problem?

Yirby: Ugh, I mean you've gotta face your fears.

Kirby: Nope. Nuh-uh. Nada.

Yirby: Yes. Si. Indeed.

Kirby: DERPITY-DOO! *Flys away*

Yirby: Ugh. I hate this show's logic.

Kirby: YOU CAN FLY TOO, YOU KNOW!

Yirby: Oh yeah.

(Classic Sonic suddenly apppears)

Yirby: Oh, hey, CS.

Classic Sonic: *random arm movements* *Translation: Kirby stole my whisky cocktail vodka beer. Get it back or else I'll cut your stomach off with a linoleum knife*

Yirby:...Gee, what crawled up your ass?

Classic Sonic: *random arm movements* *Translation: A lot of things. Mostly toilet paper*

Yirby:....

(Kirby falls into the house)

Kirby: I HAVE AN IDEA!

Yirby: On how to overcome your fears?

Kirby: *Robotnik voice* NO!

Kirby: I will KILL the ponies!

Yirby:..K, have fun in jail.

Kirby: I WILL!

Classic Sonic: *Random arm movements* *Translation: Hey, Asshat! Gimme back my Whisky Cocktail Vodka Beer!*

Kirby: I already drank that.

Classic Sonic:....*Tackles Kirby and repeatibly punches him*

(Kirby screams in agony)

Yirby:...God, this neighborhood is violent.

(Later)

(Kirby knocks on Pinkie Pie's door, holding a machine gun)

Pinkie Pie: *opens door* WHO THE F*** IS IT?

Kirby: Hi. I'm the Grim Reaper. Your time has come. *Cocks his machine gun*

Pinkie Pie: I think you're lookin' for my assistant, Fluttershy. She's avoided death so many times I've lost count...probably because I've never learned to count.

Kirby: Is this "Hutterbye" a pony?

Pinkie Pie: Yes...

Kirby: Excellent.

Pinkie Pie: Yeah, hang on. FLUTTERS**T!

Fluttershy: Yes?

Pinkie Pie: SOME DEFORMED GRIM REAPER IS HERE!!

TBA